Thanks for calling Whim and Witter, ‘with you rain or shine’.

Your call is important to us. Please stay on the line.

Just to let you know, our staff won’t tolerate abuse.

This call may be recorded in case anybody sues.

Our lines are always busy, and your call is in a queue.

Please hold. Your call’s important. You are number… thirty-two.

Listen to the following options before you choose one.

Press one to order, two for help and three to reach a human.

Four for appointments, five to change your mind, six to complain.

If asking for a refund, please hang up and call again.